“I had to get a ride home with the cops.”
Y’all had some wild stories!
Here are some of the worst:
1.
“I met a girl for a drink, and had two with her.
She wanted to take me for a ride in her loaner BMW.
Five minutes later she put it into a concrete barrier going 100 mph and got arrested for a DUI.
I had to get a ride home from the cops.”
Anonymous
2.
“She casually informed me, apropos of nothing, that she practices giving blowjobs on tampons.
She offered to demonstrate.
I said no thanks, but she did anyway.
The entire restaurant stared at us.
There was not a second date.”
“I excused myself to use the bathroom.
He followed me there and tried to peek. "
It was a comedy.”
medeaxi
5.
“It started normally enough.
I met a guy at a bar.
A week later, I met him at his place to watch a movie then go out for food.
“Mind you, Ive never met anyone in his family.
He excused himself to change.
When he came back out, he was wearing only theBoratspeedo.
Im not really sure what he thought would happen.
Whatever it was did not occur.
I left as quickly as I could and then got calls for a month trying to reconnect.
I didnt answer them.”
“He asked if I liked music.
The restaurant staff were all staring at us, and I wanted to crawl under the table.
“I was 18, living in frosty Pittsburgh, and had just graduated high school.
I went to visit my aunt and uncle for an entire month in New Orleans.
He picked me up for the date, and all was going well.
It was four guys and me, but everyone was nice.
We all took turns skiing, and his turn was up.
As we were turning around, I saw him fall.
The fall looked strange, and he was weakly waving his arms in the air.
I shouted, ‘He’s hurt!’
They all said, ‘Duh.’
I said, ‘No he’s hurt, hurry!’
I quickly figured I was in a boat of clueless young men.”
“As they were pulling him up, he was groaning and said his back hurt.
So again I had to be the one to say ‘lay him flat on the deck.’
I didn’t even know his last name.
I didn’t know where TF I was.
I didn’t know the address to my aunt’s house.
I had no money.
I just kept saying, ‘It’s our first date, ‘it’s our first date.’
All turned out well.
His friends ended up driving me to my aunt’s house.
He was up on crutches and came to see me the next week and thank me.
The doctor said without my nurse’s training he may have become disabled.
I was all like, WTF.
I’m just a stoner from PA.”
8.
“He seemed so nice and normal.
I left immediately.”
“I finally went on a date with mybest friends roommate who had been DMing me for a while.
Everything was going absolutely great, so after dinner we decided to take things over to his place.
After a few hours of chatting, his apartment door opens, and its his EX-GIRLFRIEND.
Turns out they were ‘raising the dog together.’
He chased after me trying to explain that they were not together.
Long story short they got back together, like, a week after that.
Long story short, we bought concert tickets together before I realized it maybe wasnt for me.
Mind you, my familys fromNew Jersey, but this was DIFFERENT from normal driving aggression.
Little did I know he was PISSED.
Mind you, I cry when people yell.
Ive never liked it, and this grown man was scaring the absolute shit out of me.
BY MYSELF.I found my way home that night, but man that date was fucking bonkers.
I hope he got help.”
“After chatting for a week on a dating site, we decided to meet for coffee.
As soon as we sat down at a table, he slid a piece of paper across the table.
This took me aback.
There were three questions: ‘1.
Do you have to take medication to function?
Have you ever got a DUI?
Have you ever been arrested?’
And there was a line to sign my name above it.
I left immediately.”
“We decided to walk around a nature reserve.
We both accidentally stumbled into a yellowjackets’ nest and got swarmed.
I ended up with stings all over my body.
We didnt see each other again.”
savannahp42a09898d
13.
“He randomly told me that he hates trans people.
Little did he know that I am trans.”
14.When I was in graduate school for my doctorate.
I met a gentleman at a bar, and we hit it off.
He was delightful and charming.
He asked me out and got my number.
I was also going to a foreign country to do a mission trip.
He knew all of this and seemed cool with waiting at first.
It was loud, and we could barely hear each other.
He talked about himself the whole time, and I sort of checked out.
His favorite one The Princess Bride.
I was tired and had a headache.
I did not want to do this, but he drove.
I was a people pleaser back then, and the ‘Midwest Nice’ politeness was still strong within me.
So, I agreed (mistake #3).
‘Welp, my head is going to end up in the freezer tonight.’
His mouth was very close to my ear.
I tried to escape the position several times, but his arms were like a vice around my body.
Free at last, free at last!!!
‘I was close to vomiting at this point and just wanted to leave.
I didn’t say a word.
I thought that was the end of it, but no.
He kept texting; I ignored him.
He then started to email me.
There were a good 1012 emails before they stopped.”
“I met this guy online.
He invited me out on a date, and we met up at a mall parking lot.
It was very bizarre.
He got out and asked for a hug.
I was wearing hoop earrings, and he ripped my earring out of my ear.
I’m so glad I dodged that bullet.”
“When I was young, I was basically a bowl of sugar water that attracted cockroaches.
Most of my first dates were horrible.
The shop was closed.
Bruh didnt even feed me, just opened up the shop and let me look around. "
catladyjo82
17.
She wanted to give a tour of her apartment, which started innocently enough.
Kitchen, living room, etc.
Then we went to her ‘office.’
She said, ‘This is still a work in progress, I just moved in a month ago.’
But there was one complete thing in this room.
To Taylor Swift.”
“We are both in our mid 30s.
She had four tops/shirts/jacket that had letters of authenticity of being worn on stage by TS.
Under it was a pullout drawer with three of every album released on vinyl up to that point.
One of each was opened two were unopened to preserve the value.
I was thinking…okay…everyone is into something.
Next he insisted on me telling him my full dating history including names and reasons we broke up.
Next he insulted my career path, which was event and wedding planning.
Lastly, he was offended I didnt want to kiss him as I left.
We decided to meet up for dinner; he picked me up, and we went to eat.
He suddenly went super quiet as I was cutting my chicken.
First and last date!”
“I went on a first date with a guy at Starbucks.
I would ask him a question, and he would only give a one- or two-word answer.
It was like that for the ENTIRE two hours.”
“But that isnt even the worst part.
They failed to mention that fact and didnt think it was a big deal that it went unmentioned.
I guess his guilty conscience was holding his tongue!”
“I matched with a dude on a dating site.
We exchanged some messages, and he asked if I wanted to get sushi.
We met up at the restaurant, and he was super drunk.
They all look the same’(referring to the Asian women that worked there).
I let him know that I had plans and made moves toward my vehicle.
“We had to wait for our dinner reservation so we started walking around the mall.
We entered a few stores chatting and browsing.
In one of the stores there was a stack of T-shirts.
Behind me I heard my date’s voice, ‘Oh, that will never fit you.’
Yes, yes, thank you very much for that assessment!”
I wonder if he found that confidence?”
The guy didnt remember me, so I thought ‘clean slate.’
I should have thought ‘red flag’ since he and my ex had been friends.
(Side note, my ex left town after we broke up and apparently cut ties with everyone.)
Yeah, did not see him again.”
He was late, and way overdressed in a $1,000 suit for dinner at a small pizza place.
Submissions have been edited for length/clarity.
