It is sooooo bleak out there.
Weaskedwomen of theBuzzFeed Communityto tell us theworst thinga man has eversaid to them on a date.
Here are some standouts that were submitted to our anonymous form:
1.
“I met a guy at work with whom I became friends.
He asked me to his house in the country to grill some steaks and hang out.
When we got to the house, it became a bad dream.
While grilling the steaks, he peed out of his back door.
I got busy baking the potatoes, and upon opening the oven, I discovered moldy food.
Then, his ex-wife showed up wanting child support.
Wait…it gets worse.
The steaks came off the grill rare very rare.
I like mine medium-well.
He did throw my steak back on the grill but proceeded to eat without me.
After dinner, we would drink a beer and watch a movie.
He excused himself and came back carrying what I thought was some kind of smoking unit.
It looked like a bong at first.
To my surprise, he proceeded to tell me it was a penis pump.
I left skid marks in his driveway!”
Anonymous
2.
He was rude and arrogant and said batshit things.
I sent his friend the money to transfer to him.
I wanted nothing to do with the guy.
I ran into him a few years later, and he was like, ‘Are you still mad?’
I said no, and he said, ‘Okay, cool.
I know one of your friends and she’s smoking hot.
Can you hook us up?’
Yeah, no."
“While we were driving home from our first date, he said he felt bad about cheating.
I told him I didn’t know he was married.
He said no, he felt bad about cheating on his mistress.”
We talked, but I didn’t flirt because it seemed awkward.
After a few months, he asked me on a dinner date.
We went to a really nice restaurant near his home.
When I arrived, he was waiting, and we were seated.
While waiting for the server, he said, ‘You look pretty tonight.
I haven’t seen you wear makeup before.
You wear it well.
You aren’t pretty enough to be a model.'"
I got up from the table, pushed in my chair, and left.
Thankfully, we hadn’t ordered yet, and I had driven myself.
Maybe not the strangest date, but certainly in my top five."
He laughed but apologized.
I didn’t think too much about it because it was an accident.
Then, we went to seeSaw IIin theaters.
I am not a horror movie fan, but he really wanted to see it.
He laughed maniacally and was incredibly creepy during the most grotesque parts of the movie.
It was both bizarre and embarrassing.
Then, after we left the theater, he begged me to walk on the pier with him.
I said I needed to head home, and he tried to kiss me.
I said no, and got in my car and left.
I didn’t answer, so he left that message on my voicemail.
“I met a guy on Match who, in his emails and phone calls, was very fun.
We agreed to meet up for dinner.
When I got to the restaurant, he was drinking a beer at the bar.
We got a table, and he added the bar tab to our dinner.
Halfway through the meal, he said he had forgotten his wallet at home.
I paid for the meal, even though I should have gone to the bathroom and left the restaurant.
We walked out to the parking lot, and he asked me which car was mine.
At that time, I drove a Dodge Nitro.
He said it was the ugliest car he had ever seen.
So, I asked him what he drove, and he pointed to a rusty, bench-seat pickup truck.
That’s fine, but why insult my car?
The next day, he texted me to ask if I wanted to meet for coffee.
I asked him who was paying.
I never saw or talked to him again.”
“I was on a first date making chit-chat and having drinks.
We went for a walk, and I tried to hold his hand.
I finished the date, said goodbye, and never talked to him again.”
“A man, who’d been a casual friend for years, asked me out.
I declined, as he didn’t interest me that way.
There never was a date.
We don’t speak.
I’m now married.”
“This guy took me to golf and lunch at the pub beside the golf driving range.
Then, he looked at me and said, ‘You’re an acceptable date.
Want to go on another one?’
I burst out laughing and said, ‘No, this one was enough.
Thank you.'”
“I’d been through a contentious divorce trying to keep the property I had purchased before getting married.
We went out a couple of times, and I found him unattractive and a braggart.
He loved to put on airs about having money and connections, which raised some red flags for me.
“My instincts were correct.
After I rejected him, he found another divorcee who had her own place and moved in within weeks.
I researched and found he was a complete fraud regarding his job, education, and financial status.
“When I was living in LA, I met a rather attractive gentleman at a bar on NYE.
I had just recently relocated, so I was super excited about it.
You see, he had an EMBA from Wharton, and these would be other graduate friends.
Basically, because I wasn’t as educated as him, I wouldn’t fit in.
Such a pompous jerk.
It’s gratifying to know I’m more successful than he is eight years on.”
I explained it was a personal boundary of mine.
As we took a walk, he insisted on holding hands.
Later, he slapped my ass.
I had to ask: ‘What the hell makes you think that is even remotely okay or acceptable?’
He didn’t have a good answer.
The date ended very shortly after, and there was no second date.
It was an outside bar and summertime in Florida.
He asked me why I wasn’t showing more of my body (specifically my stomach).
He said, ‘Oh, I don’t like scars.
Can you get rid of them?’
I said, ‘Too bad!
And no, they are a part of who I am.’
I promptly said no, got up, and walked away.”
“He attempted to follow and grabbed my shoulder.
I’m thankful for friends!”
“We were having a great conversation and started getting vulnerable and discussing our past traumas.
I told him about a sexual assault.
Shortly after that, he went to the washroom…and sent me a dick pic!!
When he came back, I had no words.
He asked if I liked what I saw, and I just stared at him.
He said, ‘Oh, you’re one of THOSE girls who always has to play the victim.’
Cool story, bro.”
“We met at a happy hour.
He was very self-involved and already seemed a little tipsy.
At the end of our ‘date,’ he asked for separate checks.
I had one drink.
It was $1.00.
“Blind date set up by my best friend.
I laughed so hard that I couldn’t eat.
I told my friend, ‘Thanks, but no thanks,’ when she asked how it went.”
It was filled with trash, and I felt weird, so I invited him to mine.
We talked briefly, but he would stall whenever I asked if he was ready to go inside.
He hoped I could order takeout and get it for him instead.
I asked him to get out of my car, and I drove away.”
“I went on a date with a guy who claimed to be an actor.
I found him on IMDB with one credit for a quick cameo inTrailer Park Boys.
He didn’t even have any lines, just a glance.
I guess that was enough for him to take on the title.
Anyway, he spent the entire date telling me all the ‘insider secrets’ of the movie industry.
I played along; the conversation was kind of fun.
Then he kissed me and broke down crying.
“I dated someone around Christmas time.
I helped him win a prize for the best decorated door.
Anyway, he once asked, ‘Would you change anything about me?’
I said no, and he proceeded to tell me everything I needed to change about myself.
I laughed and never spoke to him again.”
“I was at a church ice cream social for singles.
Im a non-working widow.
One of the guys approached me and asked, ‘Where do you get your money?’
I was so shocked that my only comment was, ‘At the bank, like everyone else.’
As I walked away, I heard several guys yelling at him.
How rude!!”
“On a first date, I met a guy at a nice bar that was nearly empty.
We sat at the bar and ordered drinks.
He asked if I liked oysters.
I said no, and he replied, ‘Offering you oysters is like throwing pearls to a swine.’
I fought the urge to punch him in his face and left.
Lasted all of 10 minutes.
“We matched online and met in the middle.
He arrived half an hour late and ordered food he knew I was allergic to.
At that point, I went to the washroom to regroup.
When I returned, I told him I just didn’t see a future between us.
He told me I was delusional.
I paid my portion of the bill and walked out, blocking him on everything.”
I told him that I had no intention of having sex with him as of yet.
He reacted angrily and said: ‘So I just lost the food I bought for you!’
The guy was a professional, educated person, but a troglodyte regarding women.”
UGHHHH, I could just scream.
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
