“I was very as much in love in year 24 as I was in year one.
The ending was sudden and a surprise.
Here’s what they had to say:
1. justhereforthechips
2.
Her friends became my friends, her hobbies became mine, and her goals became mine.
37, Wisconsin
3.
“For me, it’s the loneliness.
I miss the inside jokes between two people.
The laying there looking in each other’s eyes, just talking.
I haven’t even been out on a date in 12 years.
Thinking about it most of the day, every day, has been the hardest thing.
I have eternal hope.
That, however, hasn’t worked.”
65, Colorado
4.“Honestly?
metrofan
5.
“Admitting to myself that I made a serious life mistake.
Something inside said, ‘Don’t get married,’ but I shook if off as wedding jitters.
61, Utah
6.
“It was all the ‘eye-openers.’
When she left, she took her paycheck and left the bills.
There are women who actually do what they said they would.
There are women that are not jealously emotional about every other woman.”
61, Washington
7.
“It’s called ‘Divorce Poison,’ and it absolutely destroys the soul.
I never, ever thought it would happen to me.
My kids were turned against me.
The most painful experience in my life.”
64, Ohio
8.
What kind of man fails to keep his family together?
Now you’re that failure of a man.”
dizzywalrus59
9.
It’s not every day, but it is more often than I thought.”
I chased a new dream that my ex did not support.
35, Georgia
10.
“The hardest part is that the time lost is forever lost.
48, Virginia
11.
“Being no longer needed.
I was constantly busy around the house, from honey-do lists to helping my kid.
Now that it’s just me, it’s an overwhelming feeling of just not needed.”
46, Ohio
12.
“Nonetheless, my ex took me to court to reduce my visitation rights.
It started by limiting the available holidays, then extended breaks (winter, spring, etc.).
44, Arizona
13.
“When I divorced, I insisted on joint custody no ‘weekend Dad’ for me.
We decided on week-to-week custody, which eventually turned out pretty good, but it was rough initially.
Needless to say, I was a mess that night.”
70, Georgia
14.
42, New York
15.
“I have two things: 1) I struggled not having someone to care for.
I wanted to give her good company, cook her yummy meals, and make her comfortable.
I was lost being alone.
It’s been three years, and I still feel like I’m learning how to do it.”
Thinking and talking about it only brings pain and sadness.
It is certainly not something to be celebrated.”
44, Kansas
16.
Especially in my case, it was not even close to the truth.”
I never get credit or support.
44, Connecticut
17.
“Understanding how long it will take to heal from a toxic and physically abusive relationship.
I spent 10 years in the relationship, fighting for the other person.
That left me empty and bitter.
38, Colorado
18.
The situation is harder when the initiator wants out, and their spouse does not.
“I am fortunate to have found the love I only realized existed after my divorce.
My former spouse has not.
50, Virginia
19.
I have reached out to several of these friends only to be rebuffed by the majority.
There have even been instances where I ask, “Are we still in high school?”
I have been disinvited to all of the annual functions we attended.”
We were both in our 50s.”
57, Canada
20.
We had kids, and you think to yourself that she wasted your youth and your time.
“The wasting of my time I could have given to someone else.
That’s the real crime.”
47, USA
And finally…
21.
“Nobody offered me support or any advice on how to cope with the loss.
Nobody I expected, that is.
Dealing with losing my children was an awful experience and still is the worst part of divorce.
Getting divorced is like losing a spouse and all the people and memories attached to that person.
Regret, anguish, depression all of these emotions are so powerful and overwhelming.
But there is a light at the end of the tunnel.”
“Don’t give up and think love isn’t for you.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
