“Money and how to raise kids ARE the two biggest things couples will fight about.
It won’t work.”
1.MARRIED WOMEN: “He stopped caring about romance pretty early on.
My needs and desires were labeled as ‘too much’ while he expected me to do everything for him.
He didn’t want a wife he wanted a maid he could bang.”
35, USA
2.MARRIED MEN: “Men are stressed, too.
Maybe for different reasons, but just like our spouse, we, too, are overwhelmed.
40, Indiana
3.MARRIED WOMEN: “Kids.
Money and how to raise/discipline kids ARE the two biggest things couples will fight about.
It won’t work.”
I was so overwhelmed and, unfortunately, I was married to a man who didn’t help much.
It all became too much, and I lasted much longer than I should have.”
“double-check you have YOUR girlfriends, your interests, and a partner who never stops dating you.”
I’m the one who has to change behaviors, and she takes the blame for nothing.
Everything is all my fault no matter what."
How do I get out?"
I love my husband and want to show him daily.
I want to show up for my husband physically, intimately, mentally, and emotionally."
29, Oklahoma
8.MARRIED MEN: “Going without sex.
Only three times in the past two years.”
I got married in my late 30s and was well-established as a rugged individual who did what he wanted.
44, Tennessee
12.MARRIED MEN: “Feeling unheard and lonely.”
69, Massachusetts
13.MARRIED WOMEN: “You really have to like your spouse.
The most challenging aspect of marriage for me was learning to share myself.
I couldn’t continue doing what I had always done or be who I had always been.
I had to realize that there is a time to be playful and a time to be serious.
I learned that collaboration is the key.
40, Georgia
15.MARRIED WOMEN: “That you have to use preschool lessons sometimes.
The teaching ‘use your words’ goes for both sides.
You have to communicate and talk to each other to have a good marriage and work through things.
Neither person can read minds.”
34, Oregon
16.MARRIED MEN: “CHANGE.
If you think change is bad, get that idea out of your head now; growth is change.
The only way you grow is to change the things that do not work in your relationship.”
60, Michigan
17.MARRIED WOMEN: “I constantly have to ask for help.
We’re both adults living in the same home.
I shouldn’t have to ask for help doing dishes, putting laundry away, or picking up shoes.
You feel incredibly depressed.”
31, Pennsylvania
19.MARRIED WOMEN: “you’re free to’t always fix your marriage.
But it’s okay for my spouse to have that mental break.
Husbands aren’t allowed to have alone time.”
My life was all about my husband and kids.
I gained weight, withdrew from family and friends, and was watching life move without me.
Family and friends?We, as women, deal with a lot!”
42, Georgia
22.MARRIED MEN: “Having to do everything and being wrong about it.
Taking out the trash?
ensure to put it on the correct side of the driveway.
check that not to run over a plant you don’t know about.
see to it to fold the towels in a left-hand fashion.
Choosing where to go out for dinner?
Better know what she wants even if she says, ‘I don’t care.’
And so many others.”
The hardest part of my marriage is when I let my husband control my every move.
He was a terrible manager, and we almost lost our house.
We both had a low credit rating because he didn’t pay our monthly bills.
We both worked, but he controlled our salaries.
“Women should not walk into a marriage starry-eyed.
They should set boundaries before marriage.
There should be limitations discussed and agreed upon.These boundaries should include shared responsibilities as partners.
There should be an understanding of the consequences of infidelity.
A pre-nuptial could serve this purpose.
A man or woman should complete a background check on their new partner.
This action should provide a basis for the character of your new partner.”
74, Virginia
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
