“We spent the next hour cleaning his kitchen together and going out for a meal.
We’re married now.”
Here are a few of the funniest stories people shared.
“I went to grad school while working full-time and had a rough week.
My wonderful husband decided to surprise me by baking brownies.
I got home at like 11 and said, ‘Ooh, I smell chocolate!’
I held a trash bag open while he tipped the very oily brownies into it.
They made a distinctive ‘splat.'”
I bought him a hand mixer, some bowls, measuring things, a rubber scraper, you know.
He started baking everything!
One day, I came home to a beautiful pumpkin pie (in April!)
and 41 messages on my machine (that’s how long ago this was).
Every message was some version of, ‘For god’s sake, don’t eat the pie!
I mixed up the sugar and the salt!'"
u/BoozeWitch
3.
“I was helping a couple of friends cook for a large group dinner.
When I got there, my friend’s wife asked me to get some paprika from the store.
Nothing could go wrong with that, right?
Well, we had just recently moved to Germany and just started getting used to German.
“My dad needed to brine a turkey.
He put it in a plastic trash bag.
Which wouldn’t have been awful, but it was one of those heavily scented trash bags.
The turkey smelled like flowery cleaning products.”
u/Klutzy_Journalist_36
5.
“I was in my teens and wanted to cook for my mom for Mother’s Day.
I was going to make Fettuccine Alfredo, and the recipe called for wine in the sauce.
Truly not knowing anything about alcohol, I asked my dad for some wine to add to the sauce.
Needless to say, the red wine coloring did not cook out, haha!
But my mom still did very much enjoy her purple Fettuccine Alfredo!”
“I had a sister-in-law who had to learn everything from the ground up after a brain injury.
Someone told her soy sauce was like salt, so she made uschocolate chip cookieswith soy sauce.”
u/Cronewithneedles
7.
“During my senior year of college, I was making teriyaki chicken.
Fifteen minutes in the oven, it suddenly smells like I’m baking a cake.
Our Costco-sized vanilla was right next to our normal-sized teriyaki sauce.
I mixed them up when I poured the ‘teriyaki’ in to marinate.
Chicken should not taste like vanilla cake.
My boyfriend managed to eat a whole drumstick.
We are married now.”
“My wife (girlfriend then) wasn’t a great cook when we met.
She tried to make gnocchi and Alfredo sauce.
The gnocchi did what they do best when cooked and stuck together in a big potato pile.
She didn’t have any Parmesan cheese, and she thought she could just sub anything.
So, she subbed for Pepper Jack.
So, the gnocchi with Alfredo was turned into mashed potatoes with garlic Pepper Jack cream sauce.
Which was good but not at all what she was going for.”
u/Majestic-Macaron6019
9.
“When I first got into baking, I ran out of flour partway through the recipe.
I was only about 1 1/4 cups short of the recipe, and everything else was ready.
The end result was ridiculously sweet gloop brittle.”
“A friend of mine was raised in China and immigrated to the US.
He and his family are very dear friends.
They had some fairly amazing culture shock moments.
She smiled and nodded, went into the house, and handed scissors to the family members.
The four of them went out and began to cut the grass with scissors.
When the neighbor noticed, he laughed and said, ‘No, we use a machine!’
He brought his mower over and mowed their lawn.”
He was handed a cast iron skillet and a pound of bacon.
Then, as an afterthought, he was given a grease splatter screen.
He had gone to wash his hands when I checked his skillet.
We just turned the screen over to flop the bacon into the skillet and went back to the hashbrowns.
We had a good laugh about it.”
u/KDtheEsquire
11.
“You know those Pillsbury cans of rolls andcinnamon rolls?
The one you press a spoon in the seam to pop it open?
God bless my wife; I asked her to open one while I did another task super quick.
I came back to find that she had taken a can opener to one of the ends.
Between giggles, I grabbed a spoon and showed her the magic of the seam.
I absolutely adore her.”
I love seeing my husband try new foods."
u/helatruralhome
13.
I watched in amazement as he ate every morsel."
I told him I was sure it was fine and asked to taste it.
And…it wassosweet, like curry candy.
He’d grabbed the jar of powdered sugar instead of the flour.
We did not have curry that night."
u/AnActualSalamander
15.
“A guy I’d gone on two dates with invited me to his place for dinner.
“I showed up and rang the doorbell, no answer.
I call, and no answer.
I figure I’m being blown off and start to leave when the door opens.
We spent the next hour cleaning his kitchen together and going out for a meal.
We’re married now.
He’s still a splattery mess in the kitchen.”
u/screeline
17.
I asked why she was doing that, and she said the recipe said to stir by hand.”
u/Vorrtexes
19.
We wondered if he had never seen a deviled egg but knew that wasn’t possible."
She was standing there, dangling it by one leg and spinning it around.
Then she set it down, leaned back, and slowly flapped her arms like chicken wings.
My friend and I lost our shit laughing.
We all still joke about it."
u/Jinxed0ne
21.
Unfortunately, making cereal was the extent of his kitchen skills in those days.
He tried to make a box of Hamburger Helper Beef Stroganoff.
It was… unsuccessful.
He managed to eat half a plate, and I had a sandwich.
I love that goomba."
If we were good, we got to help her make dinner.
I think about this every time I see a potato."
