“The love I feel for my children is now a weight around my neck.”
No new parent looks at their baby and imagines them growing up to be a disappointment.
And why would they?
Unfortunately, as time goes on, parents' feelings about their children can change…sometimes dramatically.
Here’s what they had to say:
1.
“All in all, I’d say yes, I’m pretty disappointed.
I have the laziest, most useless children anyone has ever seen.
I only found out after paying two years' tuition fees.
“I have two sons who are five years apart.
His girlfriend of seven years is covered in so manytattoosand piercings I’ve lost count.
He, his girlfriend, and his 20-year-old nonbinary child live in subsidized housing.”
“My second son is an electrician, and his fiancee is an office manager at the same company.
They don’t want to have children.
They rent a nine-room house and are looking to buy a house.
Which one disappointed me?
They both have kind and caring hearts.
They don’t steal.
They are just really great men.
Did they both turn out like I expected?
Mary P., Quora
3.
“Yes, I’m disappointed.
One of my kids is a bit better than the other, but theyre both assholes.
I am not shirking responsibility, just answering the question.”
Mary J., Quora
4.
“Yes, I’m disappointed.
I also looked after their children for 15 years.
They are both quite wealthy but lacking in love for me.
Did it happen somewhere along the line?”
“I have three children who are adults now, and each is self-sufficient.
Like many parents, my husband and I worked hard and made many personal sacrifices.
They each have very high IQs.
I was sure I had a lawyer, an engineer, or a doctor in the group.
I even thought one was going to become a minister and church leader.
But it didn’t work out that way, and initially, I was disappointed.
My first thought was,What did we do wrong?”
“Then, one day, I realized these were my aspirations, not theirs.
I was basing my feelings on the standards dictated to me by society.
I started looking at each one of my children through a different set of lenses.
Each one has had to deal with their own personal demons.
It has been a real struggle for one, but he’s winning the battle.
Each one has a heart of gold and is compassionate toward others.
So, in the end, I have to say that I’m not disappointed in them.
I’m disappointed in me for those times that I let others get in my head.”
Diva, Quora
6.
“Yes, I am disappointed.
But it is my fault.
You know, ‘disappointment is the outcome of expectation.’
My expectation was not realistic.”
Ung-Jin K., Quora
7.
“No way, I am very proud of them!
I have three boys: two biological and one adopted.
When my wife died, the boys were 9 and 12.
When the time came for Peter to come out to his parents, Kevin wanted me to help him.
“I don’t love my daughter any less because she’s an absolute embarrassment and chronic screwup.
King F., Quora
9.
“Am I disappointed in my children?
Very much, but I consider a lot of it my fault.
I got pregnant right out of high school and then had three more children in four years.
Neither their father nor I gave them a good start in life nor set a good example.
“One is in jail for beating up his wife and has four children by three different women.
I don’t get it.
And one is disabled and lives in a group home.
People like me should not have children.”
Anonymous, Quora
10.
“I deeply regret having children.
My two kids are adults now.
One I thought would never amount to much due to learning disabilities.
He has gone on to inspire me with his determination and success overcoming obstacles.
But he is married to a woman who will drag him down, an alcoholic.
Now, she is busy dragging her husband and kids down.”
11.“Disappointed?
Yes, in the case of my daughter.
She is making some bad decisions in some respects, following in the footsteps of her father.
I hope she follows through with getting sober as her father did.”
Woodpecker, Quora
12.
They’d celebrated the evening here and were all staying over.
It turned into one of the most touching experiences.
One of the girls said, ‘You should know that he treats women with such respect.’
That made me so happy.
He’ll notice your mood if you’re down and ask if you’re okay.
Then, he’ll talk and comfort.'”
Best New Year’s Eve ever.”
Feef, Quora
13.
“I will always love my now-adult children.
I just loved them for who they were.
But what I never dreamed in a million years would happen goes beyond disappointment to heartbreak.
I’m a parent who has been estranged by two of my three adult children.”
“My son came here this morning after a night shift to bring me some essentials.
He had dark circles under his eyes.
He told me why: A 35-year-old patient was unresponsive 10 minutes after a regular checkup.
My son jumped to heart massage straight away and called for help.
After a long battle, the patient was pronounced brain dead.
Jasna V., Quora
15.
But though we may disappoint each other, we still love each other.
Disappointment is a human response, and it’s natural to feel that way sometimes.”
