I recentlyaskedtheBuzzFeed Communityto share insight on how their parent’s infidelity affected them.
Here’s what was said:
1.
I of course at the time hated him and only listened to my moms side of things.
46, Ohio
2.
“My mom f****d my best friend’s dad.
I had no idea.
Then when my parents divorced, I was finally able to see her again.
I never got in trouble at school though.”
22, North Carolina
3.
I didn’t find out about the affair until I was in high school.
I’m glad they got divorced.
35, USA
4.
“My dad cheated on my mom and left when I was 13.
He gaslit us saying we were why he left but he wasnt having an affair.
Well, his girlfriend was the, also married, mother of a teammate of mine.
It was no time until it all came out and it was incredibly hurtful for my mom and I.
The other woman was someone that my dad had always made fun of and judged harshly.
My mom babysat this other womans daughter multiple times because the woman was so irresponsible.
I was always a daddys girl until he left and treated me like trash.
I struggle with commitment and trust in romantic relationships and friendships.
Theres rarely a day where I dont struggle with issues stemming from his actions.
I could have forgiven the affair.
I cant forgive the damage hes done by being so selfish after.”
35, Utah
5.
Did he even want me alive?
thing was a whole other level of hurt that my older brother doesnt have."
Rhiannon, Scottland
6.
“My dad cheated more than 30 times on my mom, that we know of.
He was a narcissist.
Now, I struggle with feelings of inferiority and I am constantly seeking male affirmation.
It’s led me to also cheat on my partner.”
28, Iowa
7.
“My dad cheated with my moms best friend.
Jbdnco
8.
I don’t know why she went the route she did.
I was so ashamed.
At that point, two of my friends parents were still together and one was a single mother.
No one had cheated or got divorced.
I was the first and I was so scared they would judge me.
I won’t do that to someone.
I also married someone whose dad cheated, so he’s the same way.
There are better ways to end it.
Cheating just ruins everything.”
morganleslay
9.
“My dad left my mother at age 65 and in a spectacularly mean way.
However, she distanced herself for many years before.
If only they’d remained apart now they live in separate rooms in the same house.
Whenever I go to visit, each vents about the other to me.
They truly hate each other but Christian values keep my mother caring resentfully and angrily for him.”
nikkimadans
10.
My relationship with my mother has soured irrevocably over the years and we are now no contact.
My dad and I are best friends and Id die for that man.
AmyLin1202
11.
This young woman called my mom and told her about said affair, which then resulted in a divorce.
I never looked at my dad the same after this family secret came out."
44, Colorado
12.
I found out about the affair when I was 18/19.
It kinda all make sense now, but I have struggled with my existence since then."
24, NY
13.
It was a stark reminder of my father’s betrayal.
This really impacted my sense of stability and trust in relationships, making me question commitment and loyalty.
I’ve struggled with self-worth, often feeling inadequate and fearing that I, too, would be betrayed.
21, New Zealand
14.
“My Dad cheated on my Mom continuously throughout their 20-year marriage.
He was a truck driver, which made it easy for him, and this was before cell phones.
I dont think I cried about it once.
My mom will never trust any man again, and is a generally angry person.
I dont trust men either, and have a hard time believing anyone is actually happily married.”
Cats4EverBoysWhatever
15.
“I instantly became my mom’s therapist.
My dad cheated on her.
She found cell phone records and confronted him about it.
From that point on, she told me every single detail of what she knew for years.
She would come into my room to sleep with me at night, and cry herself to sleep.
Shed tell me all his secrets and meet me at the door just to tell me about my dad.
Hed cuss her out and threaten her.
She would storm into my room, sobbing.
It confused the fuck out of me.
It messed me up for a long time.
My mom hasnt had a conversation about my dad since.
I truly think they deserve each other.”
mj2005
16.
“After my mom died, I had to get some information out of her emails.
I found her dating profile info, and all the messages she’d been exchanging with men.
Turned out her monthly out-of-state business trips were serving another purpose.
We never spoke of it again.”
smg00014
17.
“My mom and dad were married for 20 years when she discovered he was a serial cheater.
Shes really resilient though, she is absolutely the strongest woman I know.
He is a narcissist and I have healthy relationships but I am way less likely to get married.”
24, Georgia
18.
“My dad cheated on my mom with a friend of hers for over 8 years.
It damaged my relationship with my dad SEVERELY.
I lost respect for him.
It made me paranoid in my OWN relationships about cheating.
I always thought my boyfriends were cheating on me and just hiding it from me.
I would constantly accuse them of cheating based on nothing.
It always boggles my mind when someone forgives a cheater, because to me it is the ultimate betrayal.
45, USA
19.And lastly, “I found out when I was 12.
I answered a call that was supposed to be for my mom.
I hated him and her.
I got teased because the affair came out.
Everyone said the daughter of the employee was my sister.
My dad always told her he would never leave his family.
But the damage was done.
I dont trust men in relationships.
I always feel theyre cheating.”
If you feel up to it, yo open up in the comment section below.
