“People thought that Id ‘change my mind.’
Im 42, and Ive never really wanted to get married.
I also knew I never wanted kids.
People usually DONT change their minds about these things.”
Here are the eye-opening results:
1.
I dont need a husband or kids to feel fulfilled, and I have zero regrets."
travelcat147
2.
“I’ve been told I was selfish for never marrying and having children.
75, North Carolina
3.
I have no regrets about doing it because it nurtured my growth and happiness.”
“I traveled and explored different career paths.
Very few are looking for meaningful relationships and are just interested in a more casual situation.
It may be a symptom of dating platforms and the quality has deeply suffered.
I’m still in it but contemplate being off of it every day.
Single may just be enough.”
52, California
4.
“That my life wouldn’t be complete somehow.
; physical touch doesn’t have to be sexual that was a big lesson for me.”
47, Oregon
5.
“‘He just doesnt want to grow up.’
I always feel like saying, ‘Oh really?
You think a man enjoys spending most evenings alone?
Is chronic loneliness the functional equivalent of immaturity?
“‘Hes afraid of responsibility.’
I would gladly take on the responsibility.
I welcome it.”
42, California
6.
“Im 45 and have never aspired to have a family.
For a while, I believed I wanted a husband but never prioritized dating with marriage as a goal.
radasteroid81
7.
“Myth: You will meet ‘the right one some day.’
It always makes me bristle when I am told that.
I’ve always known that to be malarky.
My life is whole.
There is no missing piece.
I am not waiting for someone ‘right’ or dodging someone ‘wrong.'”
“In fact, I am not waiting at all.
To this day, each of those commitments has resulted in a multitude of blessings.
Meanwhile, the man above is bitter, angry, and miserable.”
58, Texas
9.
“I’m 56, never married, no children.
Grew up in a severely toxic dysfunctional family.
I dont regret it.
It was the right choice for me.
If they were hard partiers, they assume that is what being single in your 50s is.”
“They think marriage changed them when just age changes you just as much.”
davidwigton
10.
“[One myth is] that I’m unsuccessful as a human.
I have published widely in my field of technology and mathematics, including high-impact papers in top journals.
39, USA
11.
“People think that because you are single, you always wanted to be and want to remain single.
That is 100% not true.
Its just that simple.”
48, Montana
12.
“People think that you will die alone.
Wow, what a way to guilt-trip kids into finding just anyone just to get them to have grandkids.
Some still die alone even when they are married.
My grandfather died on a business trip.
My dad died in a car accident.
What a horrid morbid thought to tell someone you ‘care for and love.’
Enjoy your life.”
Trust and communication are important.
Until then, marriage is just one part of your life.
Make your life as full as possible.
47, Canada
13.
“The myth, of course, is that you will forever be lonely and isolated without a family.
And for many single adults, that happily is not the case, for many reasons.
For me, however, it is, largely because I desperately wanted my own family.
Families spend time with other families.
And single adults spend time with their blood relatives.
Those who dont have any of that are often very lonely.”
I have to work hard for my friendships; no one reaches out to me.Thats hard.”
39, Canada
14. hovanmolly
15.
“‘Older adults are lonely.’
Being alone does not equate to being lonely.
Social interactions nowadays are complicated and riddled with landmines.
Older adults have spent a lifetime making choices regarding the degree of social interaction each requires.
At times, when life throws difficult situations at me, I question my choices.
Then, I deal with the situation and realize how serene my life has been.
Recognizing and walking away from toxic people has been one of the many blessings of being single.”
72, Canada
16.
“I always wanted to take my time in finding a long-term partner.
I never wanted children.
As I entered my 40s, finding a relationship mattered less and less.
With time, I realized I dodged two bullets.
Neither relationship would have worked out.”
68, Canada
17.
“People think that we’ve all been ‘sewing wild oats’ all these years.
I’ve had boyfriends over the years, but I’m abstinent.
And I’m not at all interested in sleeping around.
Also, we’re not miserable and waiting to live life.
43, Maryland
18.
“That Id ‘change my mind.’
Im 42, and Ive never really wanted to get married.
I also knew I never wanted kids.
People usually DONT change their minds about these things.
I dont know why so many people believe that you will.
What happens is accidents happen and then kids happen not on purpose.
Most people wont admit they regret their children.”
Since I became disabled in my 30s, that just made dating even more daunting.
I just dont have the energy to filter through bad date after bad date.
I also like having my own space, especially when it comes to my chronic pain.
I dont want a man there wanting my affection when I dont have the energy to give it.
Im still open to the idea of one, but Im really just not looking.”
No, thank you.”
55, Washington, DC
20.
I am never let down or have anyone that over-promises and under-delivers.
All of my parenting decisions are what is best for my son and us.”
“I don’t have to combine anyone else’s opinions or desires into raising my child.
Vacations are super simple since it’s what I want to do on my schedule.
47, Colorado
21.
No, it was none of that.
It is simply just that you have not found the right person to be with when dating.
Sometimes the answer is no.”
“Maybe you are not financially set, or they are not set.
Maybe other factors like aged parents you have to take care of as you get older.”
54, Illinois
22.
“I’m 39, never married, no kids, and have no regrets.
People tend to imagine us as bitter and jealous women towards married women, but we are not.
Don’t want cats, either, so no ‘cat lady’ here, either.
Reason for my decisions: Money, health, lack of motivation, love being alone.
Society still expects women to be serving, and I refuse to do that.
I also don’t want kids and marriage out of societal pressure; I was always a rebel.”
“I don’t envy anything from mothers and wives.
I’m actually happy my life is drama-free.
awfulshark13
And finally…
23.
“Ive had people say, ‘Youve never been married?
I could never do that.’
Im not doing anything, Im living my life.
Do I want companionship?
But dont assume that because Im single, Im lonely.”
57, Arizona
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
