This post includes discussions of abuse.
Recently, I asked theBuzzFeed Community, if you married someone your friends disliked, what happened?
It got so, so many responses!
Here’s what people said.
Some entries have been edited for length and clarity.
“My best friend (and roommate for a time) and my now-husband did NOT mesh for years.
They misunderstood each other’s motivations and just needed to hear each other out.
Now, they love one another and support each other 100%.
They’ll never be each other’s besties, but they don’t need to be.
:)”
2.
“No one trusted him or liked him.
I take full responsibility for my choices.
I had a lot to learn in life.
Ill never undervalue true friendship again.”
bittercactus405
3.
That added to how awful the whole ordeal was."
born_with_no_bones
4.
“I ditched them all and found new, better friends who love my husband.
Now, we have been happily married for 10 years.
If you don’t like my husband, then I dont like you.
:)”
5.
They didn’t make a run at get to know him.
I just received a call from two of them saying I needed to break up with him.
Weve been married for four years, and Im not friends with any of them.
They refused to get to know him and told me they did not support us.
It was their loss."
sarahjeanring
6.
“My husband and I got married at 20.
The amount of friends and family who told me I would waste my 20s was overwhelming at first.
It’s so special to cherish together.
We are dual-income, with no kids.
We are in bed at 8 p.m. every night, and it is wonderful.
Our life didn’t end when we got married.
Yeah, we don’t go out and party, but who gives a rip?
Dating in your 20s sounds exhausting, and we are both grateful we met each other when we did.
Here’s to proving them all wrong!!”
creativeorc26
7.
“My friends didn’t like him, but nobody told me.
After we split, all those people spoke up about how much they didn’t like him.
I wish they would have actually told me.
Maybe I would have seen the red flags everyone else said they noticed.”
Bread
9.
She even tried to get my mom to talk me out of getting married.
But she never really explained why she did not want me to get married.
She just thought it was a mistake.
She was my maid of honor, but we only spoke a few times after the wedding.
My husband and I are celebrating our 17th anniversary this year…
I made the right choice."
kaytayout
10.
“I’ve been with my husband since I graduated high school.
My friends did not like him because he was a heavy drinker.
They all disappeared, but so did his drinking problem.
Twenty years later, we are happy with two wonderful kids.
Those friends who said it would never last are still shocked.
anonymous
12.
“I am the friend in the situation.
My best friend was dating a guy I thought did not treat her right.
While I miss our friendship, I stand by what I said.
“She ended up cheating on me multiple times, before and after the marriage.
After the police were called, she got pepper sprayed and spent a couple of days in jail.
I found out much later that he had made several passes at her and cornered her at our wedding.
I wish I had paid attention to her subtle clues.
Hes gone, and in the meantime, I lost a good friend.”
“Ok, this is actually the opposite.
My best friend married a guy I could not stand.
I was always polite to him, for her sake.
There was just something off about him.
Anyway, I agreed to be her maid of honor and picked out my dress and everything.
Fast-forward a year or so later, they split up.
I got cursed out several times by him for the phone calls.
Right through their bedroom.
Neither was hurt, but she finally got the protective order she needed.
I don’t know where he is now, and I don’t really care.”
“My best friend was a very social, extroverted person.
“My best friend flat-out told me not to marry my husband.
She refused to come to our ceremony and told me I was making a big mistake.
At that time, she was dating one of his friends from work.
I thanked her for her opinion but said I was going to marry him anyway.”
My best friend and I remained close, but it wasn’t the same.
I wouldn’t confide anything to her because I knew she disapproved of our marriage.
Eventually, we drifted apart.
We Facebook message each other on birthdays.
He has never had eyes for anyone but me since we got together.
Isn’t that the way it is supposed to be??”
“I was the friend who disliked the boyfriend-turned-husband.
After they got married and had a kid of their own, his going away continued.
“He was a huge narcissist.
He love-bombed me so hard, and I dismissed anything negative anyone had to say EVER.
I loved him to no end, unfortunately.
He helped me out a lot financially at first.
My best friend saved my life.”
If you or someone you know is in immediate danger as a result of domestic violence, call 911.
