Recently, Iaskedchild-free people in theBuzzFeed Communityto share if they had any regrets about their decision.
Here’s what they had to say:
1.
She said, ‘Just try it!’
“I absolutely regret it every single day.
Friendships fade but family is always there.”
Anonymous
3.
A VERY important point that needed to be agreed on before we could get serious with each other.
We’ve been together for five years and do not regret being child-free, not even a little!
“None at all.
Amanda, Florida
5.
“I’m a boomer who never wanted to have kids and didn’t.
I had a good family life growing up.
I have never regretted my decision, and I’m now in my 70s.”
Day to day, I am content with my life.
I wish I could have given them, and a hypothetical child, that gift.”
“I’m a 50-year-old Gen X woman.
I haven’t regretted for a minute being childless.
I never sensed the baby fever many of my female and some of my male friends had.
Apart from occasionally thinking, ‘I wonder what our kids would look like?’
when in a relationship, I never thought seriously about having children.
A family friend who has known me forever said I was being ‘selfish’ for not having children.
I’ve had some influence over hundreds of high school students and college kids in that time.
This, to me, is far more gratifying than making a mini-me.”
“I’m 52 and knew when I was 16 that I never wanted kids.
I did meet the right guy and he also never wanted kids!
I love being the fun aunt, but I love my independence and ability to travel more than anything.
No regrets at all.”
Anonymous, Vancouver, Canada
9.
“I am 31 years old with no children and have no regrets.
Having children should be a ‘hell yes’ or nothing.
Just because you could, doesn’t mean your heart is in it!”
“I never wanted kids, even when I was one and got a vasectomy in my mid-20s.
Chris Camp, Bellingham, Washington
11.
“I’m 37, single, and can’t have kids due to complications without using IVF.
The cost of IVF and raising kids deters me from having them on my own.
I do think down the road, I will regret it.”
“38-year-old millennial married to a 38-year-old millennial.
We planned on having kids someday and got unexpectedly pregnant once early in our marriage.
I miscarried, which was physically painful, but not as emotionally damaging as I would have expected.
“My husband was a little slower in his realization.
He felt pressured to want kids by his family but didn’t have the desire to have kids.
Seniordogsare more our speed, so we’ve adopted a few.
I’m lucky to have friends with and without kids, and I love being an honorary aunt.
I don’t regret our decision as it’s allowed us to focus on our pets and each other.
Dogs are cheaper than kids!”
sarahheartscats
13.
“Gen X, married with no kids.
“I’m a Gen X’er.
I was pregnant three times when I lived abroad.
I lost all three pregnancies, which was devastating.
Years later I got a full hysterectomy because I was fearful of getting pregnant again.
I absolutely do not regret getting the hysterectomy or how my life has played out.
My marriage ended partially due to the pregnancy issues.
He was adopted and wanted his own biological family.
Later, I met my current partner.
I’ve also had manyanimalsthat I’ve mothered, and that has been extremely satisfying.”
“I got a master’s degree after all the pregnancies.
I now have a career and a personal life that’s extremely satisfying.
I don’t know if I would have been able to do that as a mother of three.
He indicated that it wasn’t important, but it was something I needed to say.
I decided I wasn’t going to hide in shame or regret.
At nearly 49 years old I love my life and I wouldn’t change anything about it.”
Anonymous, Wisconsin
15.
It was something neither of us ever really wanted.
Props to those who do though.”
“I have no regrets.
I like kids but love my freedom more.
Allie, California
17.
Once I left for college, the freedom was intoxicating.
No more making dinner every night, helping with homework, or doing everybody’s laundry.
It felt like breathing for the first time.
I’m 38 now and still can’t fathom giving that freedom up.
Instead, I get to be the awesome fun aunt to 12 nieces and nephews.
I wouldn’t change a thing.”
“I absolutely do not.
My partner and I have never wanted kids, and I don’t think that will ever change.
It’s not that I don’t love kids, I love my nephews and nieces to bits.
And since we are childless with double incomes, it lets us spoil the heck out of them.”
Anonymous, Iowa
19.
“I’m on the fence at the moment.
I thought I’d always wanted children but I’m 36 and childless.
Most of my friends have children but I don’t find myself jealous.
My girlfriend and I love to travel and enjoy being able to take off for long holidays.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
