“I told her that her feelings aren’t my problem.”

“It is only an invite for the kids, no in-laws are invited.

This was discussed and agreed upon by everyone.

Homer Simpson and Dr. Hibbert in an animated scene from "The Simpsons," with text "Makes sense to me."

After, everyone fills in their spouses but not all the gritty details.”

“This happened today, an emergency meeting was called by my husband.

In short he needs surgery, I wont go into more than that.

Woman embracing a man in an indoor setting, two others converse in the background

Everyone left and I got a call from my daughter-in-law upset that she wasnt invited to the meeting.”

“I asked if she knew what these were and she told me my son explained it.

She called me a jerk.”

No Entry sign on a stanchion with retractable belts at a queuing area

“My son told me he will deal with it but I could have been nicer.”

You don’t consider your kid’s spouses as family.

I feel sorry for you.

Squidward talking to SpongeBob who looks surprised, a scene from SpongeBob SquarePants show

You sound very angry and bitter."

The whole family with their codewords and excluding spouses.

So much needless drama."

Homer Simpson on the phone with a serious expression, indoors

u/celticmusebooks

“This family sounds overdramatic.

These are called normal life issues and they are not emergencies.

Most people just make a couple of phone calls and everyone else knows within a couple of weeks.

Man in a suit with a forced smile in an office setting

Definitely some main character energy in this family, especially with the secret ‘family meeting’ code.”

u/nkbee

“This is very weird.

You have an enmeshed relationship with your bio family.

Meme of two panels with cartoon man in yellow shirt, one panel with hand on face, the other covering his mouth

In-laws are family too.

Gee, I wonder why divorces are happening?

These people have married INTO your family.

Homer Simpson peeking through a green hedge

What a shitty thing to do.

Even if there are emergencies and bad news, youre all supposed to be family.

I have many siblings.

Two men in scout and business attire engage in discussion

I’m close to some of their spouses, others I’m not.

When my marriage fell apart, I told my close family first.

My brother chose her to be his wife, not me.”

Woman with braided hair, wide-eyed and mouthing "Wow!" while holding a glass

Im not as comfortable around my sisters husband as I am around her.

I never will be.

I would not feel comfortable explaining deeply personal and painful events in my life with him there.

Two characters from a TV show in a conversation, one is nodding and captioned "I HEAR YOU"

Youre letting your family have a safe space where they can feel completely comfortable."

u/Swirlyflurry

“I don’t understand all the YTA votes.

Making it about you (as daughter-in-law is doing ) is incredibly self-centred.

Man in glasses and suit on stage with a microphone; text overlay "And that's all I'm going to say."

NTA and all the best to your husband.”

u/jmbbl

My take?

Note: All submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.